“Lightness” is aim of this issue of Treasure Your Life Now. It was a busy week preparing for Thursday night’s interview with Mattison Grey which pleasurably included the last-minute surprise visit with Jonathan Manske, the other co-author of THE MOTIVATION MYTH.

Before he left us Jonathan pointed out how recipients often deny compliments when given to them. The result is that they are left in negative states rather than the positive ones the compliment-givers intended. For those of you who missed it, you can still get the complimentary MP3 download. See MYTH Interview Recording.

Rick Lelchuk’s, one of the people listening, had another call he was scheduled to be on at 8:30 PM. He found this conversation so important and helpful that he chose to stay on our call. “Why?” Check out his comments, after Tips and Queries below.

Today’s Images
Today’s issue of Treasure Your Life Now breaks from the tradition of solely featuring photographs. The focus is on play, freedom, and creating and finding beauty and satisfaction in limited spaces.

Before scrolling down to find out what the images are, I invite you to slowly enjoy each. Play in the space created. You might even be moved to do some writing or movement from them. After spending a moment or two, or more, then go below for the story.

Flowpaper image on blue sky with flying birds

Flowpaper image on blue sky with birds background

Dancing lines from Flowpaper on black background

The Story of the Images
Recently a friend of mine emailed me some drawings that her granddaughter had done using an app on her grandmother’s iPad. They were beautiful. Intrigued I immediately went to Google and found:

“Flowpaper is an interactive drawing tool that lets you make beautiful flowing paintings using your finger tip. Perfect for making a personal background for your device or for sharing with a friend.” http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/flowpaper/id424499611?mt=8

At 99 cents, I purchased it immediately; then started playing. To my delight, in a couple of minutes a drawing that excited and pleased me was complete (the top one). The next day the sixth one I did (shown on the bottom) was finished, to my satisfaction and delight, in about a minute! Four more are in a photo album on my Facebook page.

The middle picture uses one of my photos that I felt looked somewhat flat on its own, with the birds flying out of the scene; so I experimented using it as a background for drawing.

Today’s Relationship Tips and Queries
Earlier I stated that the focus of today’s Treasure Your Life Now is “play, freedom, and creating and finding beauty and satisfaction in limited spaces.” I hope that you felt that in at least one of the three pictures. I think the “play” part is evident, with the freedom, in part, being the unlimited, unrestricted possibilities in what could be created. And then there is the playfulness in the drawings themselves.

The “limited” spaces refers to the small window of the iPhone. Because of this I able to complete something quickly that gave me satisfaction.

For me, were I to have been using Flowpaper on an iPad, with a much bigger work area than the iPhone, there would have been many more aesthetic decisions that I, in my artist’s mind, might possibly be struggling with.

As I wind down here, I’m actually finding myself “stuck” for making connections with the story to this Relationships and Tips section. I suspect, from past experience with subscribers, that there is something in the images and/or what I’ve written that will resonate with some of you in terms of life situations.

I sense that there are some analogous messages here. I am giving myself the freedom to conclude now, and you the freedom to create the tips for yourself. If you do have an “aha”, please share it with us in the COMMENTS below.

Testimonial on Interview with Mattison Grey, The Motivation Myth, co-author:

“I had not heard of Mattison Grey, or any of her work, until Sheila brought it to my attention. Most of us think we have the right idea about praise and appreciation. Not until I heard Sheila’s interview with Mattison did I understand how to best transform resistance into receptivity. I’ll be using this from now on.

This was time well spent. Listen to the REPLAY. This interview will open new vistas of possibility.” Rick Lelchuk


As you undoubtedly know, if you’ve been following the last Treasure Your Life Now mailings, next Thursday, July 26th, I will be interviewing Mattison Grey, on her mission for people to be totally paid attention to.

In the beginning pages of THE MOTIVATION MYTH, the book she co-authored, Mattison writes that “attention is in short supply.” She continues, “I believe that attention is the most valuable thing we can ever give another person. Attention is interpersonal gold…. People blossom under attention. They feel good. They feel validated, appreciated, and recognized.”

And, what most of us are doing, in good faith, is not having the effect we expect. As a subscriber to Treasure Your Life Now, I assume you, too, have a commitment to showing love in the ways it will be most completely experienced and felt by the people important to you. This is why I so appreciate Mattison’s having accepted my interview invitation.

To join us on the call and/or receive the recording, simply click REGISTER. Please invite your friends to do so also. Use the same link or refer them to MOTIVATION MYTH CALL INFO.

Regarding “Paying Attention“, I invite you to have fun with today’s photos as you look at them. Are the ducks paying attention? to each other? to something else?

In a somewhat different conversation, in the last issue of Treasure Your Life Now, I promised to answer a question a survery respondent asked, “How to ask questions so he feels more involved?” See RELATIONSHIP TIPS below.

Today’s Photos

lit up whistling duck pair and diving duck

whistling ducks lit up by afternoon sunlight - with diving duck

whistling ducks face opposite directions

The above photos are of Black-Bellied Whistling Ducks in Green Cay Wetlands. They were featured in Picture to Ponder, six and seven years ago.

When I went back to the issue in which I featured the middle photo – Vol 2 – Issue 44 – I discovered it is actually a composite of two photos. I could not decide which one to feature, so with Photoshop I added the diving duck to one of the scenes. The Self-Reflecting Queries in that issue became about choices and compromise when we are indecisive. Conversely the same options can apply to different opinions between two people.

In creating analogies to interpersonal relations, my first thought in the third photo of the Whistling Ducks in duckweed (a healthy plant) was that the ducks were not paying attention to one another. As I was observing the family grouping, show in Vol 3 – Issue 52, another photographer pointed out that they were simply on the alert, protecting their babies, looking for predators.

Today’s Relationship Tips and Queries
Interacting with the photos above we could be labeling the “main characters” with qualities of indifference or disinterest in the partner.

Have you put different interpretations to them? If so, can you create ones that would be more empowering for you if you were in similar relationship situations?

In the last issue of Treasure Your Life Now, I promised to answer a question a survey respondent asked, “How to ask questions so he feels more involved?

Were I to be in conversation with the person who asked this, the first things I would check are, “To what kinds of questions are you wanting more involvement?”

“Do you have a particular agenda when asking the questions?” “If so, are you attached to the outcome, wanting it to be a certain way?”

If “yes” to my last two queries, then I invite you to revisit the intentions behind your questioning. Our “position” can definitely be felt by the other person and often result in barriers of resistance being put up by him/her.

Also, in one of the interviews I listened to last week in the Attract Your Soulmate series, the suggestion was made to, “Never ask a man how he feels about something. Rather, ask what he thinks about it.” In general, it was suggested, men are more programmed to how they think, than to how they feel.

On a final note, another thing I heard that will stay with me is that the most important thing a man wants to receive is “respect” and what he most wants in a relationship is to “protect” and support his partner.

So, in asking questions and engaging in conversation, do remember to respect the other person… male or female!

COMMENTS – Please share your experiences, adding them to the COMMENTS below.


Clarity in Asking Questions – Connecting in Relationships – Treasure Your Life Now – v8-26

July 14, 2012

Recently I wrote here that I would answer some of the questions in response to the online survey in which several of you participated. The last question in the short survey was, “If you could ask me any question about relationships what would it be?” A few of your questions were extra personal and/or need […]

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Languages and Dialects of Love and Communication in Relationships

July 7, 2012

Today’s post has much “juicy” material for consideration in any of your relationships. As I was reading and writing, I pondered communication between Sam and me during our 47 plus wonderful years together. I was quite surprised at some of the eye-opening insights and answers I got in relation to differences; why I was always […]

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Rhythm, Flow, Barriers and Walls in Relationships

June 29, 2012

The writing below, triggered by the photos, reminds us once again of the many ways we can see an image, person, or situation and the different “spins” we often put on them. Take a moment, or more, to be with each photo. Note what, if anything, resonates with you. Then go to the Queries and […]

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Sunrise – Where’s Your Focus? On the Light or the Shadows?

June 22, 2012

For today’s issue of TREASURE YOUR LIFE NOW, I’m mainly going to let the sunrise photos do the talking… your responses to them that is, without much interference, interpretations, from me. I had the pleasure of staying in a hotel on the beach, in Daytona Beach, FL, with my younger son and family this past […]

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The Words We Speak – Harsh or Loving – Using Haiku for Expression and Control

June 9, 2012

This week’s Treasure Your Life Now looks at communication in our relationships and opportunities for shifting out of negative states. We will also see a demonstration of the possibilities that can open up when “playing,” adding relaxation and fun to what’s happening in the moment. Today’s Photos and Story – Going through some old papers […]

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Are You Listening?

May 11, 2012

Treasure Your Life Now: Today’s Relationship Tip – Are you listening? Tip # 34 in Love With No Regrets “55 Ways to Show Love” is “Listen with your Heart and your Head” – The story below that goes with the photos and videos illustrated a time when I was paying more attention to the conversations […]

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Focus on the Important – Shift Your Relationship

April 28, 2012

  Relationship Tip #3 in “55 Ways to Show Love” is “Focus on the things he/she does well.”Great tip. But how do these two rose photos relate to it? The rose is beautiful. In the color photo, though, there is some distraction – on the table and in the background. It’s not a “clean” photo. […]

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Loving Her Feet

April 18, 2012

One of the tips in “55 Ways to Show Love” is “Give foot massages to partner who loves them, without expectation of receiving the same for yourself.” As I was going through black and white photos Sam took of me in the early years of our marriage, this photo grabbed my attention. Though foot massages […]

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